I grew up in a home with a predictably unpredictable alcoholic parent that provided a steady diet of hostility and high expectations.  As addiction ran through the family, I sought refuge and a surrogate family in my friends.  A couple of my friends happened to be Religious people.  We were all growing up in the Bible Belt where salvation was what life was all about.  This was contingent on the belief that you were a sinner deserving hell and only God could rescue you from hell when you apologized, believed in his Son as the sacrificial one who died for your sins and asked him to come into your life and save you from hell.  At first, I found that to be difficult to buy.  But I really liked my friends and they really wanted to keep me from going to hell.  So I decided to try their church.

I joined a youth group and felt a lot of love.  Strangely enough, the youth pastor was very similar to my drunk father.  But instead of being drunk on booze, he was drunk on his faith and saving all of us teens from hell.  So, I got religion and felt the love.  What I did not realize was that there were demands attached to this new way of life.  They were implicit rules that governed our behavior and distinguished us as being different from our peers.  If you broke these rules, you would feel shame and face the risk of being rejected.  When you’re in a group like that, it’s a strange connection with a lot of incongruence between what we said we believed and valued and how we actually behaved and lived.   Because of my child of an alcoholic tendencies, I was loyal to a fault and bound to dysfunctional organizational patterns. I was trained to smile through my emotional pain and to overlook religious abuse. At age 18, I pledged my life to becoming a servant of God as a minister.  Through many dangers, toils and snares I managed to put together a 20 year career as a pastor.  I served a church that began with 35 people and in 10 years grew to 6,000 members.   At the 10 year mark of my ministry there, I was an Associate Pastor providing religious education, pastoral counseling, chaplaincy, small group ministry and leadership development for my church.  By 2007, I achieved total emotional and spiritual burnout. I could no longer tolerate the abuse I was getting from my religious coworkers who criticized me for trying to be authentic and no longer operating as a slave to the church. My surrogate family betrayed me and I had to leave.   In 2007 I decided to check myself into a residential center to address my burnout and rejection.  I stayed for 21 days and rediscovered myself.  I learned to love myself and my view of God expanded drastically.  I had no idea how I had boxed God up.  God was much bigger than I imagined and was at work in people and places I never realized.  So that same year, I transitioned from congregational service to working as a therapist.  From 2007 to 2018, I worked at a residential treatment center called The Bridge to Recovery, which specializes in assisting individuals and families as they heal from adverse historical experiences, traumatic stress reactions and a wide spectrum of addictive patterns.  When working at The Bridge to Recovery, I first served as a Primary Therapist; then Family Program Director; and finally, as the Clinical Director.

Since 2012, I have also maintained a private practice providing counseling services and workshops for a diverse population of individuals and families.

I have been married to Kim since 1996 and we are the proud parents of two college-aged kids.

 I have a Master of Arts degree in Marriage and Family Therapy, as well as Religious Education and a Doctorate of Ministry.  I deeply value my formal educational experiences but in addition to that, I consider my personal struggles, adversities, pains and victories to be my greatest teachers.  It is important to walk in integrity. I would be honored to assist you in your healing journey.